From the Guy Who Knows Something about “Approaching”
So there she is. Maybe she’s sitting across the room, or passing you by on your daily route. She’s THAT chick, the gorgeous woman you want to talk to. You flirt every time you see each other; she gives the cute smile you love to see. You want to talk to her but you don’t know how. Well this ought to help you. If you listen to my guidelines you’ll do just fine.
Now first of all, don’t procrastinate in talking to her. If you see her and she gives you the signs(a long look or a smile or a wink), don’t wait for the next time you see her. If you do this she can only think one of two things about you. She’ll either think that “he probably doesn’t like me” or “he doesn’t have the cahones(balls) to step up to me.” And by the time you decided to step up to her, your chances for success will fall.
Next, when you see her, just take two deep breathes and walk your way up to her. Don’t be scared to make eye contact but not too much or she might think your a little scary. Now your in front of her and don’t say the stupid pick-up line you thought of.
Save it for another time, pick-up lines are dangerous because if it doesn’t work, you will look like a douche bag and if it does work you, you will seem like you planned for this conversation and thats not cool.
Be original, be yourself, if all you come up with is “hi, my name is so-so,” say it. Hears something you can do before you step up to her, observe her on your walk over. See what she’s wearing? Is she matching? Is her hair up in a special way? Look for nice earrings, nice bag, nice heals. Women take pride in these small things, and when you notice it, they love it.
Anything you admire, even it’s as simple as her smile. Whatever it is be sincere, don’t lie, people notice that. If you can’t find anything than you probably don’t really like this girl.
Anyways, now you guys have exchanged pleasantries. Be confident, but not cocky, be funny, but not a joker, be serious, but not a stiff. Be cool, calm, and collected, be yourself!
Here is the big job where most guys seem to fail. Your main job is to be observative and get her talking about herself. What is she doing? why is she where she’s at? Why is she doing what she’s doing? Ask questions and try to find that area that she is passionate about, that area that she can just talk about all day and then sit and listen to her talk.
You can say nothing in a conversation and she’ll come out of it thinking your the best conversationalist ever. Just sit and focus, don’t look at her breast if she’s sitting and don’t look at her butt if she’s standing. Keep your eyes above the neck. Nod your head, encourage her to keep speaking, as you feel her getting comfortable you begin to get comfortable, too.
The second part, where men really fail is in the listening department. Listen to what she is saying, so that when she’s done speaking, you will have something to say that is profound and true, instead of “your so pretty”.
You have already established that you think she’s pretty because YOU ARE THERE! Ask what she likes? What are her plans for the future? What are her dreams? If something is happening ask what she thinks? And don’t freak out when there are breaks in the conversation, thats normal. Silence is golden. But not for too long.
if you follow these guidelines, you should be guaranteed at least a 30 minute chat, unless she has to leave. Try to leave before the conversation dies. You’ll leave her wanting more. Ask to trade phone numbers, or if she is somebody you will regularly see don’t ask for it. Be cool about it.
So here is a recap:
- Don’t procrastinate
- Be confident, but not cocky
- Be funny, but not a joker
- Be serious, but not a stiff
- Be genuine
- Be interested
- Ask questions
- Get her talking about herself
- Listen and focus on what she’s saying
- Get number, and show strong intentions of wanting to meet again